Update on summer plans + My pre-med path (part 1)

Hi people of the internet! I told myself I was going to post more, so I’ll let ya’ll know what I be doing and what’s to come.

I’m actually really pumped for this summer for a variety of reasons! For starters, I’ll start working in a new research lab this monday, studying post-translational modification in the M18 protein. Maybe it’s the biochem nerd in me speaking, but I’m really excited to get balls-deep into science! In addition, one of the organizations I’m involved in, PEACE, will holding Bio 1B friday review sessions this summer. Since this is very new thing we’re trying, I’m excited to see if it will go anywhere, and how members of the Berkeley community can continue to improve our collective experiences as scholars!! On top of that, I’ll continue volunteering at the Berkeley Free Clinic, and I recently started at Alta Bates. So yeah, that’s what I’ll be doing this summer!

Oh wait, PLOT TWIST: I’m taking the MCAT this August too!!! Which means one thing: this summer is going to be extremely turnt. I’m slightly nervous (verbal is wrecking me), but ready to get down to business to defeat the Huns!

So I realized that I pretty much never post, and I’d like to make a post elaborating on my “pre-med” path, how it started, and where it’s (hopefully) going. Maybe it’s the MCAT making think about pre-med life, but I’ve reflecting over my reasons for wanting to a doctor and while at the time I wasn’t able to explain everything I had been feeling, I think I’m somewhat able to narrate my feelings. I think this is a really important self-dialogue to have because you’ll eventually need to articulate this in your personal statement, and also it’s important to be honest with yourself. I hope ya’ll take something out of this and the many other posts to come 🙂

Like many people I know, I entered college as pre-med; that is to say, from the moment I walked through that door in 176 Barrows, I knew I had a strong interest in medicine and that I was going to take all of the pre-med reqs and all that other fun stuff. However, I haven’t been dying to be a doctor since I was 10. I never had some really cool surgery or medical situation that inspired me to pursue this path, and although I’ve experienced many deaths in the family, they didn’t really make me interested in medicine. During high school, I’d say volunteering at the Westminster Free Clinic sparked my interest in medicine the most. I remember one patient in particular: the patient presented symptoms like migraines, pain, and some cold-like symptoms, and how the doctor responded was really shocking. He started asking the patient about how her personal life was doing, and through talking to her about that, he learned of the many stresses and problems in her life that contributed to these symptoms. Without any medication whatsoever, the doctor was able to reassure the patient, and let her know what she needed to do rid her of those symptoms. That experience was formative in that it showed me how medicine, at its ideal, appeals to my academic and personal interests in so many ways: a detective-like approach to solving scientific problems, and awesome immersion into applied physiology and pharmacology, but most of all, being able to empower people to change their lives, whether it be through self-care, medication, a healthier lifestyle, or other measures. I think this last point was especially impactful on a sort of existential/moral-outlook/purpose-for-life level because I realized what I want to do with my life. On the most superficial level, I want to “help people,” but more importantly, and this is something I’ve been realizing continuously over the past two years, I want to transform lives on so many different levels, and it’s this passion for people, so to speak, that I think has grown exponentially in college and is the reason why I’m going to be sleep-deprived this summer when I could be be chillaxing. In the moments after seeing that patient, I didn’t immediately realized any of this, but I’ve been mulling over it ever since because I always ask myself why I want to be a doctor, and sometimes I felt I couldn’t give myself a great answer beyond the standard “science+helping people” combo.

And let me be clear: it’s not like this passion/drive only explains why I want to pursue medicine. It pretty much explains everything about me, bar my tendency to swear profusely or my sense of humor. It explains why I want to study Public Health (a multi-tiered approach to improving health); it explains why I’m involved in Mental Health organizations ( I want to promote a healthier/less-stigmatized dialogue about our emotions); it explains why I spend several hours a week tutoring for free when I could be making bank (because I want to help people make the most out of education, and I also like hearing my voice), and the list  goes on and on and on and on. I remember back in high school that I wanted to be a senator, and back then the only reasons I could think of were that a) I liked politics and b) I wanted to filibuster any and all socially conservative bills. When I look back, I think this really tied in to my desire to transform public policy, which has an enormous impact on how people are socialized and conduct their lives.

Of all that I’ve done in college, and I think I’ve done a metric shit-ton so far, I think volunteering at the Berkeley Free Clinic has really strengthened my passion for medicine. I think I’ve learned two big things at the clnicA big thing at the clinic we try to be our clients “advocates.” For many people, this may be synonymous with service provider/doctor, but it’s really a much more inclusive term. Having dealt with clients from so many different gender, sexual, racial, political, and socioeconomic backgrounds, I’ve learned that providing care to a person, which in itself is a problematic term to an extent, is more than just dealing with their immediate medical needs, and even those are affected by their other situations. I strive to be an advocate for everyone: whether this be helping someone with their medical needs or being there for a friend in their time of need, I want to embrace the nuance and complexity of human emotion and struggles and work together to improve the situation. And a lot of doing this is to empower individuals through information, confidence, reassurance, and other forms of support to achieve whatever goal they may have. Being judgmental and other-ing is a huge, huge, huge problem in our society and a big barrier to healthcare. And I’m all about tearing these barriers to the ground yo.

Another important thing I’ve learned, and this’ll probably be my last point, is how to deal with the worst case scenario of helping people: when in the desire to do great things, we screw up and hurt someone. While I’ve never had anyone’s life dangling at my fingertips, I’ve had to deal with mistakes I’ve made while volunteering that have undoubtedly harmed others. Whether I misspoke when I was talking about STI stuff or I made an appointment taking error and someone wasn’t able to get a TB test to get into their shelter, I have learned to accept the fact that I do screw up and as a doctor, I will undoubtedly continue to screw up. Screwing up is part of life. But I don’t let that get to me: I instead try to learn from my mistakes and continue going ahead trying to assist others, knowing that there’s always the possibility of making mistakes. I think this is really important for all pre-meds to consider the fact that as doctors, they will unintentionally harm people. And accepting that is a huge step in determining if medicine is a suitable career.

 

I’ll post more about pre-med related things in the future!!! I’d love to hear everyone’s feedback. Happy Friday, and stay based!